some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
