i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Randomize
