she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
