i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
