I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
Randomize
