If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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