Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Randomize
