I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
