we have officially lost it.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize