You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
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