Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
