she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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