I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
