nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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