dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
