NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
