Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I want a musical about memes.
Randomize
