woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Randomize
