Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
