TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Randomize
