If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
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