Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Your penis caused this!
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
