Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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