so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
