Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize