The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
How external is "for external use only"?
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
