So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Randomize
