i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Randomize
