He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
