I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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