I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
It's rum buckets o'clock
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
I party with great urgency now.
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