apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize
