mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
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