So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
