no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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