I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
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