He asked to "fluff my boner.."
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
i out mim tonsoeep
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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