I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
