In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
My day in three words: secret purse cake
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
