No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize