Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
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He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize