I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
