oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize