The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize