So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
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do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
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U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
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