if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Randomize