Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
29 Of The Most Hilarious And Embarrassing Walks Of Shame Ever
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
These 23 Dudes Get Giddy From Dem Titties
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit