Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
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