Where is the hickey?
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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