YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Randomize
