pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
